No angel

> I got asked the other day by a young woman, creative, and well traveled, if the house I was renting was in an area that was mostly... white. She had been asking questions about the alarm system,etc, and was concerned about her safety. I bit my lip then said I understand your concerns about being single woman and have asked many of the same questions myself in my life - except for the racial question. Yes the area is safe. You are in a city. If you are not involved in drugs then over here you are as safe as anyone else. Should I have said more. Yes. I was taken aback though. What to say never seems to hit my tongue in the right moment.
> I know that when I was in college I was a subject to the media's (cop shows, movies, thriller books, news etc) constant emphasis on crime and black men. I was from a small town. I learned - I set out to learn. I learned that I'm more likely to be attacked by someone I know. I learned that I am more likely to be harmed by someone of my own race. Those were the real stats. Then I got mad. Mad that my thoughts were so tainted. And what my mom raised me to do came into play...I thought, I asked, I talked, I confronted. I confronted the racist in me, the intolerant in me, the insecure in me. I learned that what I knew in my heart, people are just the same, I had to fight for everyday. I learned that I have to challenge my assumptions forever because the ideas that I think are mine may not be, and may not be true. I rarely watch cop shows etc now - they piss me off. I push myself everyday to grow as a kinder person. I am not always successful but I've met so many caring people in my neighborhood and that helps. I love people. But there are days like today, when I process what happened the other day, that I cry, and I'm over it all. I have not suffered the indignities and pain that my friends who are not white have. And I am so scared for my baby.